I normally think of times of trial as being a way for God to draw you to him. While that is true, I may have a deeper meaning. An uglier, sneakier side of this.
From problems with my last pregnancy, a baby that wouldn't sleep for nuttin', recurring back issues and a head injury I've been through the mill. Having Momma sick or hurt puts a strain on the whole family. We need to eat, dishes need washed, kids need attention. I've, so far, been able to bounce back on nearly all accounts. It seems I've been able to pay attention to everything except for my marriage.
My husband gets to pull double duty when I'm down and never fails. But we have zero time alone together. By the time the kids go to bed, I exercise and have a snack, it's 9pm and I'm barely able to keep my eyes open to hear about his day. Our conversations are 99% centered around the children and I find that I don't say much sometimes because I don't want to sound like I'm complaining.
This is the fallout. The details. The chink in the armor that the Major Liar is trying to exploit. It just occurred to me last night that there is more going on than my personal struggle to cope. It has to do with the lack of time spent on cultivating my most important relationship here on Earth. The busyness, the fatigue, the challenging situations - they have all served to take my eyes off of my husband and put my focus anywhere else.
While Satan may be many things, he's not stupid. The best way to destroy things within a family is to shift it's focus. Mom and Dad have to be totally committed to each other first (with Christ in the middle), and their children second. When the shift happens, and they get "to busy" things will start to break down.
Time to make date nights a priority. Thanks to an upcoming schedule change, we will be sharing meals together again. I think it's going to be okay!